It's our choice--Day 1

I think the second favorite gift I got for Christmas was a robe. I don't think I'd ever owned a robe before. Wow. They're as warm as they look. I never knew how much I wanted one till I actually had one. At the top of my list of Christmas presents was a book. It called "The Grace Awakening" by Chuck Swindoll. We had read excerpts of the book in our last Bible study and I go to church where there are no "grace killers" that I know of, but it's still a really great read.

I never knew how much I needed God's grace till I actually knew it existed.

Today I read about Chuck's first two ways (out of five) of claiming grace. By "claiming grace", he means to take five of the more tender spots in our personal lives and understanding how God's grace can help. We need to claim grace in our insecurities, our weaknesses, in abrasiveness, with compromise and with our pride.

Today, I started with insecurity. In scripture (1 Corinthians 15:6-11), Paul admits his weakness, but understands that "by the grace of God, I am what I am, and His grace toward me did not prove vain." Paul could have let his past problems haunt him, but he refused to. He understood that through the grace of God, sins were forgiven and he was given an important, yet undeserved, role in God's plan.

I finished with weakness. From 2 Cor. 12:7-10, I read that "I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong." My hobby, and sometimes my weakness, has always been with computers or anything that looks or acts like a computer. It is a solitary hobby for a solitary person. With three great children and one spectacular wife though, I am not in solitude very often, yet I find myself near my computer anyway. I'm not much a TV person, so the computer is essentially my TV.

I'm giving that up today for Lent. I use a computer at work, and I will use my computer to blog, and I will help others if necessary, but as far as recreational purposes, I'm done for a while. While I can be content with my weaknesses, I cannot allow myself to not be changed. I want to find ways to better fill my important, yet undeserved role in God's plan. I'm praying much of this extra time is well used. Kim, the kids, and anyone who has time to read the solitary thoughts of a not so solitary man, will hold me accountable.

On a related, but totally different topic, I realized how difficult it can be to try to keep God at the forefront of my thoughts when I'm under the weather. I did not feel well yesterday at all. I ate nothing all day which probably attributed to how wore down I felt. Today, I felt better. Blessings are more easily realized. I was blessed by the amount of sleep I had gotten. Once I got home, said Hi to the fam as they got home from Girl Scouts, and had a sandwich, I laid on the couch...and promptly fell asleep for the next 12 hours. I felt revived! I was revived enough to notice another blessing as I stepped into work running a little late. I saw my co-worker minimize the screen he was working on, maximize the timeclock and step out of the way, before I even had a chance to open the lab door. I punched in right on time. Seeing random acts of kindness are great ways to start the day.

I ended my day with another thought.

You see, everyone with e-mail capabilities e-mails everyone within their group what their day was comprised of doing. It's a good way of keeping the lines of communication flowing. Yesterday, when I was not feeling well, my e-mail was very small. I did what I usually did and was not needed to do anything extra. It seemed odd as I wrote it, but there it was. Today, when I was feeling better and more energized, I was asked to do quite a bit more than normal. It was really a great day and went smoothly. I considered how much of a blessing that was. On a day I was feeling great, I was pulled in many directions, yet on the day I was feeling sick, I was only pulled in one. Let me just say God has a hand in everything.

Speaking of sickness, a few weeks ago, I had overheard a worker mention to our H.R. personnel that his wife was sick and how he had had to take a couple days off of work to stay with her. I immediately said a prayer for her, him and their family. Today, I was reminded of something someone in my Bible study group had said. She believed that if you let someone know you're praying for them, many times it lifts their spirits. He did not seem down by any means, but I wanted to know how she was doing. So, surprising even myself, I asked. He said she had lung cancer that had spread to her brain. He said that today she said she felt like giving up. She was very depressed. He said he did what he could to keep her spirits up, but it was tough. I asked if they had a church and he said no, but their daughter did and he had met some people at the hospital and they were all praying for them, and I told him that I was too. He thanked me and that ended our conversation. Retelling that story to Kim or writing it down just pierces my heart. I hope I never feel like "giving up", but I may, even with the Holy Spirit dwelling within me. I've prayed for healing and peace for both of them and hope others continue to do the same. I also pray that if they do not know the Lord, that they do so soon. I pray that prayer for anyone who does not know Him.

I was also reminded of the parable of the talents from Matthew. Two of the three men did very well with what was given them, while another did nothing. The two were given much more responsibility, while the third was seemingly condemned to die. I suppose the telling of why I was reminded of this parable may be a little self-serving and may also take this parable out of context. If we do well with what God has given us, we will be given more responsibilities in the Kingdom of Heaven. If we do nothing, we are condemned. It's our choice. Pursue Him as he pursues us. Get the Word out. Love others as He loves us. Love Him with all your strength, with all your heart, with all your mind, and with all your soul.