Day 6

In my old(er) age, I've finally grown to be comfortable in my own skin. Still, I'd like to see myself through other's eyes, just for an hour or so. I see one of my buddies from work, and I know he's a little quirky and a bit quiet. Another is sort of a geek (I mean that in the nicest way possible). Another is talkative, but seems to be a nice guy. I suppose I wonder how I'm seen. I'm not even sure how I'd describe myself,but I must say I feel more driven with the Lord's strength guiding me.

In my Bible study group, sometimes I feel like I'm talking too much. On the other hand, we're there to discuss and sometimes the silence is so deafening. I figure that's the best time to get something off my chest. On the other hand, I really enjoy the commentary of others. Tim and Cody are the new couple, and I prayed they would join, so right now I'm sort of hanging on every word. There have been times where one or the other has put something I was thinking so brilliantly into words that I can't help but smile. Inwardly, I'm thinking "EXACTLY!!" or "YES, THAT'S IT!!" and leaping across the coffee table for a huge high five. Outwardly, I smile and nod slowly. The same happens for the other couples, but the newness has not worn off yet.

At work, I wonder if I'll ever be "That Guy". I don't suppose so, but right or wrong, I've brought up my faith or God to more people than had ever brought Him up to me in my lifetime of work. If I could, I'd have a faith based discussion with everyone at work every day. The different perspectives would be awesome. Even those who don't believe would at least give me the opportunity to witness to them a bit. I just don't feel that trying to be nice and respectful and honest and trying to make all the correct decisions is enough. On the other hand, I don't know if I'm the right man for the job. On the third hand, I feel so blessed. It's not right to not let others know what God has done for me.

By the way, these 6 days have not been easy. I've strayed from my goal of total separation as far as recreational computing, but I've done well so far. I've got a feeling that this is not just a Lent thing. I'm praying it's a lifestyle change.

God is good.